zzzzz...wha...who...what did I miss? zzz....

Thank you, boys.

Congratulations and very well done.

I haven't slept properly in 2 weeks...but watching you guys bring home another World Series title...so worth it. I enjoyed the blowouts as much as the tight games. (Starting an hour earlier would have been nice though...)

And thank YOU Jacoby....mmmm...free taco....

ps...sign Lowel and pass on A-Rod! kthxbi!

It's astounding....

"time is fleeting...madness...takes it's toll..."

Ooops...sorry...slipped into a little RHPS memory there...

But really...it's ASTOUNDING. It's, what, 2007, almost 2008? And even though the microwaves in my office MIGHT have been manufactured during the Nixon years...microwaves have still been around for a while, right? (I googled it - 1946, however commercial use ones were around mid 1960s)

And microwave popcorn? (googled it - 1949 )

Nineteen-f-ing-forty-nine, people!!!

So please explain to me WHY my coworkers (ok - ONE in particular) can't grasp the concept of microwaving popcorn and NOT burning it?

Hell - can't you follow the pictures on the package? It shows some stick figure LISTENING to the popcorn in the microwave...when the popping slows, the burning starts!

Most microwaves have this handy-dandy button called...ta-da...the POPCORN BUTTON. Set it and forget it people!

For those who care: The history of the microwave oven

(side note...my new favorite site is http://wiki.answers.com/ )

Really...I'm surprised I popped out brunette.

So, a couple years ago...I was bitching to my husband that my face was breaking out because I was constantly holding my phone at work up to my face for long conference calls. Being the great hubby he is...the next day he came home with a headset and "splitter" box for me. (did he pay for such items - hell no. Since his office had switched over to IP phones, all this stuff was in the "obsolete equipment" room...so he helped himself.)

Street value of this get-up is like $175.

Now, I'm on the only one with this "splitter" set up at work..which is nice because I can "mute" the mouth piece on it and not have to constantly switch out my hand/headset...they are both plugged into the splitter.

Well, ever since last Friday..my headset has been acting weird...no one could hear me when I talked and what-not. And today, seconds before an hour long conference call..the whole thing decided to pull a 'no workey'.

BOOO!!!

So I dial into the conference call...and start looking at the splitter to see what's wrong...I'm blowing dust off it, checking connections...then I see this thing that looks like a battery cover.

um...wtf? This thing takes batteries?

Then I see an AC/DC input thingie in the back...

um...wtf? He didn't steal me the plug for this...wait, this thing needs POWER? *cocks head to the side* EH?

I was so fartin' confused...but off to Walgreens I went for some AA batteries...and what do you know...it works!

So...in conclusion..yes, I've had this thing on my desk for AT LEAST 2 years, and had NO fartin' clue that it required BATTERIES.

Dear Mother Nature & all you weather "experts": You owe me $7.69

Today IS October 8th, correct?
And I AM living in Connecticut, right?

So could someone please explain to me why it's Eighty-f-ing-three degrees out right now?

WHERE is Autumn? Where are the cool days that make you want to curl up with a cup of hot cocoa and stay inside because it's all rainy and nasty outside? The brisk mornings perfect for walking the dog? The "bundle up cause it's cold out" afternoons of raking leaves?

No, what we have is people dropping dead while attempting to run a marathon in excessive heat.

And me...dressing for the WEATHER FORECASTED...and packing the appropriate lunch.

74 and cloudy? Sounds like a good soup day.

But no...it has to be 83 and (blazing) sunny out. And I have to be sweating my ass off in a cashmere cardigan. And I can't possibly eat soup for lunch, so I drive to Panera to get something that won't make me sweat any more.

So I say to you Mother Nature and whoever the weather guy was on wtnh last night...you owe me $7.69 for my turkey and cheese on country with cucumbers - hold the mayo and pickle, chips and drink on the side.

I'll gladly take Paypal.

(should I just jack the rest of the 8 day forecast up by 10 degrees each day? Or do you think ya'll could get a bit better at your jobs?)

Just starting out here...

If you've found your way here...congrats, you're just as intrigued about this as I am! I'm not entirely sure what route I want this blog to go...but I have to thank KG for showing me a damn fine way of getting through the work day! *mwah*

Most people might think this is quite...odd...but please refer to the notion above: getting me through the work day!

I'd have to say my favorite blog in the world belongs to the wonderful Jen Lancaster...if you haven't had a chance to check out her razor sharp wit, I highly suggest you check it out. Because really? She's the sh*t. Her blog, jennsylvania was actually the inspiration for her first book, Bitter is the New Black which was recommended to me by the lovely Miss Candy...who failed to tell me that reading this book in public would solicit some odd looks due to the snorting, giggling, and generally LOL'ing.

So may this blog be as random as hers...if it's only half as entertaining, I will be happy.

************

To lead the random-ness off? I present to you, a shower made for midgets.

Now really...I ask the designers of the lovely Polynesian Resort at Walt Disney World...is your average guest only 4'9"? Because really? I'm 5'9", and eye-level with this shower head. I honestly wonder how anyone taller could shower in here...as it was, I took a horizontal shower. I'm sorry, but if I'm paying top dollar to stay at a "deluxe" resort on Walt Disney's property (ok, if my HUSBAND is paying top dollar...), is it too much to ask to be able to stand up straight while showering?